On March 23, 2015, Kate created a profile on Okcupid.

Some 300 opening messages later, she's been on a whopping 15 dates.

Kate likes women. This feeling does not appear to be mutual.

Clearly, she is doing something right.

Wasted Opportunity

"I’ll just get this out of the way, because I know what everyone is thinking… yes, my avocado is overly ripe. It’s now in the garbage where it can mix with the old tomato and lime I had to throw out. You’re welcome, citizens of whatever landfill* the City of Los Angeles will ultimately haul you to. I hope you find a bag of Tostitos® that hasn’t been ravaged by a Hitchcockian flock of seagulls and enjoy my offering of trash guac.

*annoyingly I spent 30 minutes doing some hardcore googling to find the exact location servicing [redacted], but I couldn’t track that down. Honestly, the lack of specificity really ruins this joke. 4/10"

Nature, Reserved

Bitter End