On March 23, 2015, Kate created a profile on Okcupid.

Some 300 opening messages later, she's been on a whopping 15 dates.

Kate likes women. This feeling does not appear to be mutual.

Clearly, she is doing something right.

Foot Notes

"Honestly, at this point whenever I lose a sock in the wash, I expect it's somehow found its way into my hair... and that my hair has then eaten it. What I'm saying is my hair is like the wardrobe that leads to Narnia — if said wardrobe were made out of keratin and was suitable for the nesting of small birds and had a taste for human fle... women's accessories."

She thought I was cute, but said she'd rather date my socks. Turns out one day she'd gotten curious, and the next thing she knew she was ankle deep in a Hanes 4-pack. I guess you can't just go cotton to cotton to cotton to cotton, then suddenly cotton to people. (Unless you're my hair.)










*1. cotton, noun — thread or cloth manufactured from the fiber of cotton plants.
*2. cotton to, intr. verb — to take a liking (e.g. a dog that didn't cotton to strangers).
*3. cotton (on) to, intr. verb — to come to understand (e.g. he cottoned on to what I was saying).
*4. Ergo, "I guess you can't just go take a liking to cotton (in order) to come to understand cotton, then suddenly (go from) cotton to people." (Unless you're my hair.)
*5. English is weird, ya'll.

Gag Reflex

The Motherboard We Share