"Do you ever get super intense existential crises while walking through Target? All I can think about as I turn the corner from coffee pots to cargo shorts is the utter banality of life... how many minutes we spend staring at things and stuff; this modern rainbow of molded plastic, waffling over which waffle maker is better — the one that's shaped like a Corgi, or the one that lets you post your breakfast to Snapchat — deciding what to buy with our time turned cash. Then I think about how we even got here as a species, and about traffic, and having to make my bed, and the little rubber stopper I need for the bathroom door, and the fact that the life expectancy of someone my age means I have roughly 57 more years of hearing my heels clack across a beige, smudge of peppermint latte that was spilled and left to dry atop the fluorescent-cast linoleum of a big-box store size enough to comfortably house a pair of decommissioned 737's formerly on wet lease to Continental Airlines, and... I should probably stop going to Target, shouldn't I?"
It really makes you think about what's most important.
*1. In 1989 (and only 1989) the slogan for Continental Airlines was "Working To Be Your Choice." It was immediately followed by "One Airline Can Make a Difference," but that doesn't exactly make a good pun/title. You're not even reading this, are you?