On March 23, 2015, Kate created a profile on Okcupid.

Some 300 opening messages later, she's been on a whopping 15 dates.

Kate likes women. This feeling does not appear to be mutual.

Clearly, she is doing something right.

à la Commode

"See, you'd think apple pie would be the fastest way to my heart. But I'm the one person from New England who doesn't actually like it. Much to my mother's chagrin, since (according to her (and all those who've eaten it)) she makes a killer asshole pie.

*apple pie... ahem."

You can thank the fine employees of Asshole, Inc. for this gem of a typo. I truly appreciate the hard work and countless hours those men and women have put in to not fixing autocorrect.

Miss Demeanor

Nature, Reserved