On March 23, 2015, Kate created a profile on OkCupid.

Some 200 opening messages later, she's been on a whopping 4 dates.

Kate likes women. That feeling does not appear to be mutual.

Clearly, she's doing something right.

Each post is an excerpt of a message this seemingly inexorable self-saboteur has sent, backdated to its original send date.

More of the same is guaranteed.

I'm Not A Big Fan Of Chain Stores Like Abercrombie Or Banana Republic, But I Don't Mind The Gap

"The following actually happened, and I have the screenshots to prove it...

Months ago my best friend (Ryan) was flying from Boston to Los Angeles by way of Dallas, and I made a comment about him riding the tram at the airport. I then went on a weird tangent rating various trams I'd had been on, leading him to jokingly suggest I create a tram review blog. So while he was in the air between DFW and LAX... I did.

https://tramreviewbloghereyougoryan.wordpress.com/

It's quite possibly the silliest thing I've ever done. I swear, there's a point to this.

Fast forward to two weeks ago. I'm flying from Connecticut to Minneapolis, headed to Los Angeles. Then we have engine trouble... 

I'll let the texts take it from here:

Me: "Got diverted to Rochester. Rebooked to a connection through Detroit. Guess who's riding some trams today!"

Ryan: "Live your tram dreams! Ride eternal,shiny and chrome"

Three hours later, now in Detroit...

Me: "WITNESS ME." [insert picture of tram]

Ryan: [insert picture of Slit the War Boy pointing] 

Me: [insert picture of Nux, mouth chromed up]

The End.

TL;DR I'm a writer, Fury Road is the fucking best, and I have a weakness for girls with unsettlingly intense preoccupations with movies and television shows, because I am one myself.*

I'm also not a serial killer."
 

*According to her "You should message me if" section, I ticked all her boxes. We ended up chatting for several weeks.

But boy did that go off the rails.

Charming

The Anthropology of Us