On March 23, 2015, Kate created a profile on OkCupid.

Some 200 opening messages later, she's been on a whopping 4 dates.

Kate likes women. That feeling does not appear to be mutual.

Clearly, she's doing something right.

Each post is an excerpt of a message this seemingly inexorable self-saboteur has sent, backdated to its original send date.

More of the same is guaranteed.

Killer Reference

"Banana slugs are egregiously under-catered toward as a people. I mean, you have a poop emoji masquerading as chocolate soft-serve, but can't bother to depict a 9.8 inch long yellow slug in 128 square pixel form? How do you sleep at night, Tim Cook?

I've been to 5 countries as well."

I think she went to UCSC. I'm still salty about it.

Brass Tacts

At First Blush