On March 23, 2015, Kate created a profile on OkCupid.

Some 200 opening messages later, she's been on a whopping 4 dates.

Kate likes women. That feeling does not appear to be mutual.

Clearly, she's doing something right.

Each post is an excerpt of a message this seemingly inexorable self-saboteur has sent, backdated to its original send date.

More of the same is guaranteed.

In My Defense, She Was Quite Fetching

"Can I pet your dog? Please say yes. Afterwards we can get coffee and talk about how badly I'd like to pet your dog again."

Comic, Sans Jokes

She Told Me To Eat Shit