On March 23, 2015, Kate created a profile on OkCupid.

Some 200 opening messages later, she's been on a whopping 4 dates.

Kate likes women. That feeling does not appear to be mutual.

Clearly, she's doing something right.

Each post is an excerpt of a message this seemingly inexorable self-saboteur has sent, backdated to its original send date.

More of the same is guaranteed.

She Had The Goods

"I have the strangest craving for blueberry muffins after reading your profile. I can't explain it."

Such Notions Are Beneath Me

If We Share A 401K We Can Have Mutual Interests