On March 23, 2015, Kate created a profile on OkCupid.

Some 200 opening messages later, she's been on a whopping 4 dates.

Kate likes women. That feeling does not appear to be mutual.

Clearly, she's doing something right.

Each post is an excerpt of a message this seemingly inexorable self-saboteur has sent, backdated to its original send date.

More of the same is guaranteed.

Low Hanging Fruit

"Why do bananas even exist? This is one of life's most perplexing questions, and "just to give me a stomach ache" can't be the answer."

Typed In A Flamboyant Manor

Probable Cure