On March 23, 2015, Kate created a profile on OkCupid.

Some 200 opening messages later, she's been on a whopping 4 dates.

Kate likes women. That feeling does not appear to be mutual.

Clearly, she's doing something right.

Each post is an excerpt of a message this seemingly inexorable self-saboteur has sent, backdated to its original send date.

More of the same is guaranteed.

She Told Me To Eat Shit

"Which John Waters movie do you live in? Your answer may be highly revealing.

Please don't say Pink Flamingos."

Her answer was Cry Baby.  (She didn't actually tell me to eat shit, though. That would have been divine.)

In My Defense, She Was Quite Fetching

We Must Have A Musical Joke